The thing about these sets of people is that they are good at hiding the kind of person they are. They always appear to be what they are not. Very nice set of people, always smiling but behind those amazing smiles lays a predator.
A ruthless person who is not ashamed or scared of exploiting others in despicable manners, who think they are unique and don’t have to follow the same set of rules everyone does. They wait for their victims to be vulnerable and trusting before taking advantage of them.
Who a sexual predator is
A sexual predator is a person who seeks out sexual contact with another person in a predatory or abusive manner.
These kinds of people are responsible for sexual harassment, assault, rape, and pedophilia. Some of them see sex as a form of dominance and control.
While some attempt to exploit adult victims, the majority of them are child sexual predators. They have a distinct sexual preference for children. They build trust with these minors as a form of grooming.
Sexual predators believe that their behavior is not harmful and that some women are just simply sex objects who deserve mistreatment, some even go as far as saying that their victim enjoyed it and that they wanted or initiated the sexual contact.
This deformed self-talk permits them to do something they know is wrong, and dissuades them from feeling bad about doing it.
Sexual predators are specialists at projecting a kind and generous exterior. This charming act is used to gain the trust of other adults and get access to children.
The following are some of the attributes of a sexual predator.
1. They create Trust
The predator gains trust by being very attentive. They show the child or adult special attention. They are the knight in shining armor, and who never hurt them.
They feel protected, loved, respected, and wanted by them. Child predators even go as far as gaining the trust of the child’s parents, by doing favors or offering to help with things.
This is the beginning of the grooming process. The perpetrator will use their loyalty, and vulnerability to their advantage.
2. Using manipulative language.
The element of backlighting will be slow but carefully introduced; they will begin by insulting or mocking the victim on their appearance, behavior, clothing, and friends or other parts of their personal life.
When challenged on this behavior they may lie and twist the information making the victim feel they are at fault.
In the end, she was emotionally exhausted with no other choice than to accept it was all her fault and apologize.
This shows the predator that he can control and manipulate her without any fear that she will challenge him.
3. They play the victim.
These kinds of men are associated with grandiose behavior.
They never take responsibility and always act like they are the victim. Their kind of cool indifference is very similar to narcissism but not all narcissists are sexual predators.
They use coercive control to get the victim to play their stupid games, always blaming her for what goes wrong.
4. They push physical and sexual boundaries.
Sexual predators push past healthy boundaries. This behavior starts with supposedly innocent touches on the back, hand, or leg. This act will escalate to inappropriate touching on the thigh, near the genitals, breast, etc.
If the predator is in a relationship with the victim, they may cross re-establish boundaries or fail to ask for approval.
They may use manipulation to propel the person to do things that make them uncomfortable.
For children, the predator may introduce and normalize ideas of sex to the child. By talking to the child about sex, making subtle jokes, showing them pornography, or encouraging them to be naked together, they may be able to introduce the sexual activity by telling the child it’s a “game“.
5. Very jealous and controlling
In some cases, the sexual predator may be jealous and controlling around friends, family members, or other romantic interests.
They may start to monitor the victim’s social media movement, personal life, and day-to-day activities.
They might further become controlling, even try to limit the victim’s contact with others especially those of the opposite sex.
All of this behavior will destroy the victim’s confidence, leaving her lonely and overwhelmed.
Finally, pay close attention to the adults your child knows and loves, including family members. 90% of child sexual abuses are perpetrated by someone they know and trust.
Also if you feel you are in or have been in a relationship with a sexual predator, please speak up and seek help because you need to free yourself from a sexual predator.
Know that it is not your fault, be consistent, strong and have your voice respected.
And if by any chance you strongly suspect someone you know maybe a sexual predator or a victim of a sexual predator, kindly take the necessary steps by reporting and helping them get help.
