Expectations are good, they give us a sense of direction and rationale, or help us to meet certain goals. However, when we let our expectations influence our thoughts so much that they rule us isn’t something you should give a chance.
Expecting too much from one’s self can leave you drained, stressed out, and resentful. This is because our expectations are often unrealistic, which then becomes too much to handle.
Expectations are solely conjecture of what the future might hold based upon strongly held premises. We have expectations of others. And others amass their expectations on us. Some of these expectations are realistic and others are not.
Once we understand that our expectations are nothing more than our best assumption of what we want our life to look like, only then can we maintain ownership of our goals.
What is Expectation
Expectations are a product of our imaginations. It’s believing that something is going to happen this way, only to find out that it didn’t turn out the way you wanted.
Ways you can manage your expectations
Give yourself Time
The majority of us want stuff when we want it, this is good but it can make us hard on ourselves in terms of personal expectations. Being ambitious is greatly commendable when it is moving at a healthy pace.
The problem arises when we expect to achieve our goals immediately without proper planning. We must be mindful of our timeline when setting goals and objectives for our life, make sure the goals are realistic and time-bound.
Have different options
Disappointment always slips in when we are unable to meet up with the expectation we set for ourselves. The truth is there are several ways to achieve a goal, always try to have different strategies for achieving your goals.
You can also talk to people about your expectations to get their opinions or bits of advice on the different strategies you have.
Sometimes it is helpful when you rethink and discuss your expectations with others, this will help you decide if your goals are achievable or not.
Detach your self-worth from the result
If you think the only time you deserve to be happy and peaceful is when you’ve attained a goal, then you will never feel fulfilled even when you achieve them.
This is not to say that aspiring for more is not necessary, all I’m saying is that your happiness shouldn’t depend on how much you’ve achieved but rather on yourself because you are inherently worthy. It’s only when you relax that you can give your best.
Don’t be too Harsh on yourself
If you let your expectations rule you, every day will be a struggle. We are all guilty of criticizing and bringing ourselves down every time we fail at something. Instead of talking yourself down why not see yourself as an explorer experiencing life.
Whether you succeed or fail, try to learn as you go. Expectations can sometimes put unnecessary pressure on you. Recover the joy of living and enjoy the process.
Always Expect the Unexpected
You need to learn and unlearn certain ways of thinking and start expecting the unexpected. Life is full of unpredictable outcomes and disappointments but we can not continue to beat ourselves up all the time.
Redirect your mind to identifying thoughts, emotions, and feelings without projecting an unrealistic future. Also, accept the worst and aim for the best. Remember that life is not perfect, take away the pressure and appreciate each day as it comes.
Everyone gets disappointed by unmet expectations, the truth is you are not the only one, let this somehow encourage you to stop beating yourself down. Expect the best from yourself and learn to enjoy the process.
