You can spend £50 on your child without thinking twice.
You can send money to family when they need help.
You can buy your partner a thoughtful gift.
You can contribute when your friends are celebrating something.
But when it comes to buying something for yourself, suddenly, there is a meeting in your head.
“Do I really need this?”
“Maybe I should wait.”
“I could use this money for something else.”
And before you know it, you’ve talked yourself out of it.
Again.
For many women, spending money on themselves comes with an unnecessary amount of guilt.
Somehow, everyone else’s needs come first
Maybe you grew up watching your mother do the same thing.
She would buy things for everyone else but hesitate when it came to herself.
Or maybe life has simply taught you to always be responsible.
There are bills to pay. Children to look after. Savings to build. Family members who may need help.
So when you finally want that dress, a nice dinner, a weekend away or even something as simple as booking your hair, it can feel almost irresponsible.
But here’s the thing: you are allowed to enjoy your money too.
Being financially responsible doesn’t mean denying yourself every nice thing.
You don’t have to earn a treat
Sometimes women act as though they need to complete a certain number of responsibilities before they are allowed to enjoy themselves.
The house must be sorted.
The bills must be paid.
Everyone else must be happy.
Then, maybe, you can think about yourself.
But life doesn’t always become perfectly organised.
There will probably always be another bill.
Another responsibility.
Another reason to wait.
If you keep postponing every little thing that makes you happy, you may wake up one day wondering when exactly you planned to start enjoying your own life.
Of course, spend within your means
This isn’t about encouraging reckless spending or buying things you cannot afford.
Sometimes the answer genuinely is, “Not this month.”
But there is a difference between not being able to afford something and feeling guilty because you think spending on yourself is selfish.
They are not the same thing.
You can pay your bills, save for the future and still occasionally buy something simply because you like it.
You don’t always need a practical reason.
Sometimes, “I wanted it and I could afford it” is enough.
Maybe put yourself on the list too
You don’t have to spend thousands of pounds.
It could be a new perfume.
A meal somewhere nice.
A book.
A dress you’ve been looking at for weeks.
A day out with no children asking where you are.
Whatever it is, remember this:
You work hard for your money.
You take care of a lot.
You think about everyone.
So perhaps, every now and then, stop feeling guilty for doing something nice for yourself.
You don’t have to come last every single time.
Put yourself on the list too.
